(Alternate title: In Which I Enjoy Not Being a Ho-Bag)
Sometimes your heart is exploding with love and it HURTS!
I didn't fall. I didn't trip. I didn't do anything stupid. And it ended up not being awful. It was actually kind of awesome.
Friday night, I went to a shady little place in the mall to get my nails done by an adorable little Korean named Debbie. She was fun. And didn't have an accent, which was excellent for me. While I was sitting under the nail dryer, I saw one of the other debs walking through the mall with a boy who may or may not have been her escort. It was sufficiently uncomfortable.
Saturday morning was a little rough. I had to be at The Viking Views car wash for a little while, but I wasn't allowed to wash cars or be in the sun, so I sat under an awning and begged old men for donations for an hour.
Afterwards, I had to go get my hair done. She curled my hair magnificently, but I was not thrilled with the final product. I was actually fairly uncomfortable. The top was too Snooki, my bangs were weird, and I just felt too pageant-y. So I complained about it for a few hours, and then my mom finally got annoyed with me and told me to wash it and start all over. Luckily, my favorite hair magician, Jess, came over and fixed it. She made the top less poofy, parted it a little differently, and we fixed my bangs.
Then we sat in my living room and my dad decided he wanted to teach Jess the Greek dance I have to do. I was still really bad at it. So while my dad was trying to figure out how to play music, Jess and I did our May Fiesta dance and then watched part of the May Fiesta DVD from last year. We laughed until we cried. It was possibly the best therapy I could have asked for.
Then we danced around my living room. I don't know how, but Jess picked it up really quickly and for whatever reason actually had marginal success in teaching me, even though she's not actually Greek. "Grapevine...runrunrun...forward...backward..." :)
After Jessica left, I put in the debutante ball episode of "Gilmore Girls" and watched it for the third time since getting myself into this mess. Then I got dressed, put makeup on, and paced around the house freaking out.
Zach arrived around 6:30. We took some pictures, he gave me flowers, I hugged my physics teacher, and then his parents departed. Jess came back shortly after and we took some more pictures. I'm sure the people driving down the street were confused. You don't often see a boy going to prom with two dates.
Warning: this is where I'm going to start to get kind of sappy.
Zach and Jess - I really honestly don't know what I would have done without you guys there. And I don't think you realize how genuinely concerned I was that you wouldn't love me anymore after the event. I can't really ever fully express how grateful I was that you were both there and so supportive, or how much I absolutely adore you.
Jessica, thank you for not dressing like a prostitute and being so poised and warm and loving. And thank you for fixing my hair and having faith in my stupid dancing. It really meant a lot to me that you could be there. I'm sorry I made you show emotion. Thank you for loving me.
Zachary, I know you didn't want to, but I'm so beyond thrilled you did. The process wouldn't have been half as fun without you as my escort. Thank you for being the classiest of the bunch and for being so sweet and respectful.
You guys made it perfect. I love you to pieces.
Cocktail hour was nerve-wracking. The family was super excited. One of my aunts gave me a necklace, everyone except me ate things and then after an hour I had to go change. I didn't want to leave. I didn't want to be without people who love me for an hour. But it was okay. I changed, sat on a couch and took up a cushion and a half of space of it.
Why don't people wear bras? I am very pro-bra. I don't know if it's because I'm a 38DD and not wearing a bra is not an option, but I like bras. Also, you should wear underwear, especially when you're in a room with seven other girls changing into a classy dress. You should just wear underwear, okay?
The hour we were back there, while unnecessarily long, actually went okay. I chatted politely with a few of the other girls; we talked about how nervous we were, our dresses, and our escorts. I eavesdropped a little on some of the girls talking about how they're planning on wearing tiaras to prom. I will never understand that.
Then we moved from the bridal room to the stage, where they arranged us and we all determined that we really had to pee. Then we stood and waited and goofed off behind the curtain while Greek people gave exhausting speeches.
I don't actually remember much of presentation. I remember them opening the curtain and looking out and seeing my parents standing in the back. I remember looking directly at my aunt and seeing Jess and finally starting to glisten a little bit near the eyes. I remember almost forgetting to curtsy on the right side of the stage. I remember Zach not letting me fall. But after I got off the stage, I don't really remember much of what happened. I know my mom said a few things to me, but I don't remember what they were.
We did the daddy/daughter dance and my dad made me cry. The whole thing was so convoluted though because there were all sorts of photographers running around taking pictures, including my godmother and Jess. Then my dad handed me off to Zach and they played the wrong song. Which was really funny, because we were really geared up for "A Moment Like This." So when "I'll Be" started, it was a bit of a disappointment. Jess was attempting to take pictures with one camera and video with another. Then the song was over, he kissed my hand, I kissed his cheek, and then there was Greek dancing.
Apparently I faked it pretty decently, but then a circuit blew as the band was playing, so I temporarily got out of leading. We went to the dessert room, where it was much cooler, and sat for a few minute before we heard the band get started again. Then Zach and Jess convinced me to go back and dance again. Leading wasn't awful. I just don't ever want to do it again. Then everyone else joined in, and the rest of everything was sort of a blur, except for the blisters on my feet. Zach and Jess were quite impressive dancing on the floor. I was proud of them. They fit right in, and I didn't know that was possible.
We went back to the dessert room while we waited for our turn to take pictures. Pictures were awkward. It was just so ridiculously loud in the ballroom, so trying to place people where they needed to be was quite challenging. I felt bad for the guy who was there from the Akron Beacon Journal. He did not appear to be having much fun. Then there was more dancing, I changed back into my cocktail hour dress and then it was pretty much over.
We came home and I made coffee. Zach, Jess, and I sat around the dining room table for a while before this terrifying flying bug appeared and then we somehow all ended up sitting under the table trying to shield ourselves. We're pansies. They went home around 1.
It was nowhere near as painful as I thought it would be. And I really, really appreciate everyone who was involved, even though most of them will never read this. Which is probably a good thing.
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