In Which I Attempt to Catch You Up and Tell You About my Escort

I don't know why this idea didn't occur to me earlier. It wasn't until Sara and Jess brought it up earlier that I even considered it. But this experience of being a Greek debutante really has provided me with a lot of good stories, and they need a place, so this is it.

Hi. I'm Alexa. I'm 18 years old, a senior in high school, female, and of Greek descent. These traits have qualified me to be a debutante through the Order of a AHEPA, an organization, which, from what I can tell, puts a bunch of Greek men in a room with Greek food and allows them to argue very loudly about things that don't make sense to me. My father happens to be the current president of AHEPA Chapter 59, but I'm not really sure how he came to power. Each year in the spring, the Daughters of Penelope, the ladies branch of the AHEPA, holds a debutante ball for those of us who are young ladies, seniors in high school, of Greek descent, and in good standing with the Order of AHEPA.

So I guess when your dad is president, that means you're in good standing with the Order of AHEPA.

Last October, I was officially approached with the possibility of being a deb. I wasn't really thrilled by the prospect, but the guilt I knew I would feel over declining the invitation outweighed by own personal feelings.

Have you ever seen "My Big Fat Greek Wedding?" I hope you have, otherwise the following comparison will make no sense to you. But basically, it's all true. Everything except the Windex being a cure-all for everything, although I wish that WAS true. You laugh, but it is a startlingly accurate depiction of the Greek culture.

And I'm sort of free-spirited.

In any case, the first step in my process of becoming a debutante was finding an escort. It doesn't sound like it would be challenging, but the list of boys who like me is astoundingly slim. Zach was immediately at the top of my list because he is, for lack of a better term, a classy bitch. And we fight like siblings, so having him around could be a lot of fun. However, I was immediately concerned he would say no.

And he did. At first.

He blamed it on his extremely German, Greek-hating grandfather, who he claimed would come after him wielding a shotgun for taking part in a Greek event. Zach's initial resistance led me to believe I could possibly get out of having to be a debutante, but upon informing my family I did not yet have an escort, they told me that the church could provide me with one if necessary. And then I became desperate. So then I resorted to dignified begging. Which just kind of irritated Zach.

Somehow, in an unexpected twist of events, it was Zach's grandpa who ended up convincing him he should escort me. The details are still somewhat hazy to me. But I'm grateful, even though Zach isn't always thrilled with his role.

That whole process actually took about three months, so this is obviously a long story cut short. But there is so much more to come.

Coming up next: the first meeting.